By Mabel Doge Luhan
I admit I have a bee in my bonnet when it comes to fellows named Donald. Who could blame me? I have a long political memory! Centuries may have passed, but I will never forgive Donald of the Isles for betraying Robert the Bruce! (And don’t get me started on Donald Cargill, who founded the Covenant Party when Ben Fitial was still in swaddling-clouts!)
This Donald Manglona character, however, is not so bad. In fact, he recently introduced three bills in the CNMI Senate: one good, one bad, and one puzzling. Whatever the actual merits of the bills, I have to commend Mr. Manglona, because as far as I can tell, none of the bills he was in a hurry to introduce are written to benefit him or his relatives. Goodness, by forgetting the main legislative mandate of enriching oneself and one’s relatives, Si Donald must have made himself the laughingstock of the CNMI Legislature! Whatever the actual merits of his bills, it is clear that all three bills are presented in good faith, and that is, unfortunately, unusual — and commendable.
The first bill is the good one.
It’s so clearly good that the only puzzling thing is it hasn’t been passed into law:
https://cnmileg.net/documents/
23-55 removes the requirement for having immigration status in order to drive a car in the CNMI. This is obvious, and were it not for a post-9/11 flurry of misguided do-somethingism, we wouldn’t have this problem now. But right now, people whose CW or other status has expired aren’t allowed to get a driver’s license. And in the CNMI, you can’t even buy a car, nor obtain insurance, without having your very own driver’s license (which is somewhat comical, given the CNMI political elite’s fondness for chauffeurs). These people are forced to pay for taxis, drive illegally (and without insurance), or just walk. There is absolutely no reason for it. Yes, they overstayed their immigration status. So what? It’s not a crime, and we allow accused and even convicted felons to get driver’s licenses. (For those in the back of the room: a driver’s permit has nothing to do with voting, Real ID, or any of your spicy fantasies about “migrants.” And take your Seroquel.)
The second bill is the bad one.
https://cnmileg.net/documents/
Allowing foreign doctors to practice at CHCC sounds good, right? No. No way. The basic assumption driving this bill is that doctors are doctors, and why not use the non-US ones that are ready, willing, and cheap? Here’s the factual response: a medical degree from countries like the Philippines, China, or Bangladesh is a far, far, far cry from a medical degree from any US medical school. There is barely any comparison. It is absolutely not true that “a doctor is a doctor.” And it is also not true that having taken a course or seminar in the US, which is how many high-end physicians in the Philippines are “US trained,” is equal to US medical licensing. Are there “diamonds in the rough” physicians in those countries who are just as good as our US trained physicians? Sure. But neither CHCC’s political-hack management nor the tiny CNMI licensing board are equipped to evaluate that. We (meaning the CNMI, as well as the US) have medical licensing requirements for a reason. They’re there to protect us. Let them. And alleviate the staffing shortage by hiring more physicians’ assistants and nurse practitioners for tasks like draining my bedsores and refusing my constant demands for opium suppositories
And then there’s the somewhat puzzling bill of Donald’s:
https://cnmileg.net/documents/
23-13… was this written in 1923? Because it’s talking about microfilm archives?! I don’t know whether there’s a well-connected archivist whose job needs saving, but the entire gist of any such bill should be digitizing all the records and storing them in a digital vault with an outside provider like AWS Cloud. (No, your cousin’s Google Drive account is not sufficient, even if he made the email address [email protected].) The bad news for government jobs is that all we need in the CNMI is one person scanning, categorizing, and uploading the documents to the archival service, most likely far from being a full-time job. The good news for the government budget is exactly the same. We don’t need extensive physical facilities and staff for these archives. We just need some people to scan all this stuff and store it in digital archives, then send the paper to Marpi — and in the future, try to keep all CNMI government records digital, even bribe requests and love notes to achakmas!
Biba, Donald Manglona, for introducing three interesting, discussion-worthy, and not blatantly corruption-motivated bills. Biba also Emmanuel Erediano for three entirely competent articles about these bills. Oh, I’m in such a good mood that I’m also going to say biba for Bryan Manabat and Andrew Roberto for their recent spate of professionally written articles in the Marianas Variety!
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Mabel Doge Luhan is a woman of loose morals. She resides in Kagman V, where she pursues her passions of crocheting, beatboxing, and falconry.
