By Mabel Doge Luhan Just like the time a gentleman suitor on SilverSingles asked me whether I speak Greek, I think the Saipan Tribune might be in the midst of…

By Mabel Doge Luhan If you’re going to do something, it’s always better to complete the mission, instead of just stopping halfway.  Consider my two most virile falcons, Genghis Khan…

By Mabel Doge Luhan Oh, death and taxes! How well they dance together! I haven’t paid any taxes since I had myself declared legally dead in 1962. Perhaps that boy…

By Mabel Doge Luhan I, for one, am against open borders. Foreigners claim to be “in search of a better life,” but all they do is take away our livelihoods…

By Mabel Doge Luhan Hey, Jude! In the October 26th Marianas Variety article (and I use that term loosely!) “Senate adopts joint resolution calling for 902 talks,” you were quoted…

By Mabel Doge Luhan Oh, how I love the avant garde! Just last night, I saw performance art of a plushie Jesus shooting pugua spit from his bussy! And this…

By Mabel Doge Luhan I was playing “Alcoholic or Schizophrenic?” while reading the Marianas Variety comments section and a thought came: why does the CNMI require immigration status in order…

By Mabel Doge Luhan What is the job of a newspaper, if not to demean and belittle the most vulnerable members of our society? Comfort the comfortable, and don’t forget…

By Mabel Doge Luhan Maybe at my age, I’m getting loopy. Maybe it’s the shot of laudanum I’ve been adding to my morning swig of Scott’s Emulsion. But I just…

By Mabel Doge Luhan TIMES ARE TOUGH in the CNMI, and everyone is looking for a way to make a buck!  It’s been decades since I’ve had any inquiries thrown…